


Told ya, I only live here when I work

by Benniedrankthecocacola



Category: Metalocalypse (Cartoon)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-16
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-05-12 21:02:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19237030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Benniedrankthecocacola/pseuds/Benniedrankthecocacola
Summary: “WHAT?”William’s eyes went wide, his body tensed.“You did not think I live here, did you. It’s not like I’m your producer 24-hours-a-day, okay babe? I own a house actually. Look, I’ve got a little bit of personal life here and there, it’s a good thing for a guy to have. So see ya later in the studio, okay?”(Dick and Murderface having issues. Also I didn't write Will's accent, I'm not good with accents, hope you don't mind)





	Told ya, I only live here when I work

1

William spotted him as he was heading through the main hall, small black suitcase in his hand, a bag hang over the shoulder. 

“Hey!” the bassist waved to him from the couch he occupied at the moment. None else seemed to be around. His voice sounded funny in the room that was definitely to huge and cold for it’s hoarse cheerfulness.

“Hey, Willy” Knubbler gave him a quick smile and kept walking. His hand tightened on the suitcase. Fuck, he thought they were all supposed to be out, getting wasted in some bar. At least that’s what Abigail told him about half an hour ago. Well, fuck dammit, Dick really could pass on Marderface’s babble right now.

“Eyy, what the fuck! You gonna ignore me?!”

There he goes. The producer sighed.

“No, look, I’m just in a rush you know. So see ya later babe, okay?”

He tried to walk away but William raised from his seat leaving a bottle of tequila behind and after few seconds he lined up with Dick, loitering by his side. 

“Are you kidding? It’s Friday fucking afternoon and you say you are in a rush. Slow down, man, take it easy. It’s not like you are some fucking lawyer, right?”

It was indeed Friday afternoon but Knubbler couldn’t help thinking that it sounded hilarious. Murderface was a member of Dethklok. They had Friday afternoon all damn week long. They did not record a thing in last six days. Unlike him. Since Charles has been gone, Abigail asked him to do stuff he was literally disgusted of, so much paperwork and idle talk with people he sometimes didn’t even know. But he kind of accepted this responsibility. The situation was tough and he didn’t want to put his position in music industry- let alone his life- in danger. As long as he was working for Dethklok he had some hind of cover. So goodbye pop-rocks and coke, hello Abigail’s bullshit. Heh, at least till Friday afternoon.

By the way, wasn’t there a song called like that? No, Dick frowned, that was Tuesday Afternoon, The Moody Blues, late 60’s. Ah whatever. Did it matter anyway?

He looked straight into Murderface’s eyes.

“Nah, but I’ve been through some stuff lately and I thought maybe I need a little trip’ he moved his eyebrows ‘like a real trip.”

“You mean… drug trip?” Will seemed somewhat suspicious. He gave Dick’s suitcase a hostile look as if he was wondering how much LSD could be tucked in there. 

“No, like a car trip, I’m gonna get in a car and drive outta here. But don’t worry, I’ll be back soon.”

“You are all selfish brats! You are all going out to party and I don’t even know where you are! I don’t even know that I’m not invited until I find out, fuck you all!”

“William, I ain’t going to a party.”

“You want me to believe you gonna fuck some chick tonight? Noo way haha...- he laughed cruelly but Knubbler could clearly see panic in his bright, greenish eyes- or… you really got a date? Poor girl then.”

Stop, just stop- Dick wished- why are you always making it worse? He felt his head was about to blow up. 

“Hey, you know, those bags are not so light, so I’ll be moving, okay? I’m not going on a date, I’m going home.”

Suddenly the room was filled with silence. 

“WHAT?”

William’s eyes went wide, his body tensed. 

“You did not think I live here, did you. It’s not like I’m your producer 24-hours-a-day, okay babe? I own a house actually. Look, I’ve got a little bit of personal life here and there, it’s a good thing for a guy to have. So see ya later in the studio, okay?”

“See you later in the studio, is that it” Murderface echoed, his voice flat. His face shown many feelings, hard feelings that Dick couldn’t even name “See you later in the studio. So that’s what it is. It’s just… cold. Thought we were… i don’t know, friends.”

“We are. No offense”

Dick did not feel so great about this whole situation but he was angry and exhausted so he just tried to walk away again. The fastest he could. Unfortunately few meters later he heard Will’s voice calling him once again.

“Wait! You’re not ever inviting me? Why can’t I go with you?”

“Are you serious, no way babe! You’ll piss at my carpet for fuck’s sake! That is the last thing I need! If I wanted piss at my carpet I would get myself a cat!”

That was a great excuse, Dick was grateful that it came to his mind so easily. Very reasonable thing  
to say, sounded slick, almost true. 

“C’mon, fuck you, I won’t. Promise. May I come along?”

Dick saw a sparkle of real hope in his eyes. All he could do was to put his luggage an a side and walk back to the bassist, who stood in the very same place as before.

“Maybe someday else, William. Maybe… someday else.”

He gently patted other guy’s shoulder. For a short while they looked each other eye to eye and then Knubbler shrugged. 

“You know, I dig you babe, but I got to keep movin on, keep movin on” And grinned.

“Was it…?”

“Yeah?”

“Something from a song? I know that line”

“Yeah! Too many songs on my mind, babe. Hope one day I could quote Planet Piss” 

He grinned again and walk away. William didn’t see him in next three days. 

 

2

Dick pushed the door open and leaned towards William.

‘‘Here, babe. Come in, would ya’’ He waited till the other guy got inside and then followed “Hope you wouldn’t mind if I locked the door.”

He didn’t wait for permission, just did his thing and turned back to William with a smile. Poor boy seemed confused, Dick caught a suspicious look in his eye. A corner of his mouth twitched under the thick mustache. 

“Why? You ain’t gonna fucking let me out?”

So yeah, Dick thought, someone must have been telling him stuff, Abigail or maybe good old Charlie. Or maybe he just did his homework himself and found out that Dick Knubbler was in fact a nasty little son of the bitch?

“Nooo, look, it’s just, ya know, I love working here with you guys but as long as you are in Mordhaus ya never know that’s gonna happen. Ya better keep your doors shut. Like… look, I once got real damn wasted, got back here, forgot to lock the door, and guess who is standing in the middle of my room out of the blue? Leonard fuckin Rockso.”

William laughed, he wasn’t so tense anymore.

“So what did you do?”

“Ah, he told me he can smell coke like a police dog. And aaah, he refused to leave so i had to use a little… taser…”

Dick scratched his wrist. 

“Fuck, how could I miss it! I should have been here”

“Ughhm yeah, anyway, babe... i think we need some fresh air, good it’s late, fuck, i hate those summers. One can only live in night.“ Fly around like a bat, hang upside down, he added in his thoughts. 

Will was curiously looking around, as they walked through Dick’s apartment. It was bigger than he expected and with only a little light turned on it seemed rather cold and lifeless. Dick had heavy curtains on his windows, probably to prevent the heat from getting inside. 

“Man, you really live here? Seems more like a hotel room. Thought you’d have more fancy stuff.”

“Told ya I have a house in the city. This place… I only live here when I work”

“You work all the goddamn time! I mean maybe not exactly work but you… you press the buttons, you walk around, you talk bout shit, i don’t know! I thought you’d at least have a proper room!”

Something was weird about this conversation, there was some hidden sense to it that Knubbler couldn’t get. He felt his cyborg eyes get red.

“William, excuse me but does my lack of interior design (or whatever it is) bother ya?”

Murderface blinked, surprised and cornered by the frankness of the question.

“What?” He clearly didn’t know what to say, as he didn’t know what was in his own mind “I...” He stuttered and then got angry “I don’t care, you could have 10 or 10 thousand houses and I wouldn’t care less! Do whatever you want, you can have a room with just a bed here, I don’t give a shit! But- his face winced as he gave out his final bark- But it’s just… so INHUMAN.”

Oh, this was something big, Dick thought, too confused to simply get furious. This was bigger than he initially thought. It was getting symbolic, wasn’t it... Dick’s lack of commitment to his apartment in Mordhaus was just a symptom to his lack of commitment to the whole Dethklok thing? He wasn’t loyal and involved enough? Oh Lord… Dick almost lost his grip and did a facepalm, his electric pupils turned brighter as he stood still. Yes, he realized, this whole house-bullshit-speech is just Murderface feeling betrayed and abandoned. 

“William, wait. Before we go all mad and crazy… Is it me having a house bringing you down, or is it me being distant?”

Knubbler did not feel comfortable with those kind of talks, it wasn’t his style. William glanced at him in silence, his head was nearly boiling with insecurity and mixed-up feelings.

“Don’t go twinkletiting me like that, you motherfucker.”

“Johnatan Twinkletits is bullshit. Fucking idiot.”

“He is a genius.”

“Genius my ass. Whatever. You gonna answer?”

“Go to hell, no. This is stupid.”

“No, if the answer is yes it actually isn’t. It is more like… nice.” And it means you are a jealous bastard. But instead of it he just added “It just mean we’re being pals, babe. And maybe ya want me to focus on Planet Piss.”

Murderface seemed as if something was tearing him apart from the inside. His teeth clanked.

“Planet Piss?! Are you kidding?!”

“No?” He carefully tilt his head to a side “What is it then?”

“Nothing! Nothing at all! Get off me!”

Dick stepped closer and looked him straight in the eye.

“We are not so good in talking, do we" He whispered quietly. Will gulped.”Guess that’ll never change.”

At this point Dick felt like surrender. He always handled with problems as if they didn’t exist. But now he grew tired of his „Okay, that’s not my business” or „I’m too high for it” attitude. That was just sad. William was standing close to him in a dimming light, arms crossed, vest on his broad shoulders, face dogged and stubborn. They came here because Dick wanted to show him a record that he hoped would inspire some fresh Planet Piss stuff. In fact Knubbler was kind of interested in what music would appeal to Murderface. Maybe he wanted Will to listen to some songs he himself enjoyed? He believed there is untapped potential and creativity that strives for direction in this small weird drunk lazy world they were both living in. Maybe that all was a disguise. 

“William?”

“…”

“I’m gonna ask ye a question, okay? A little tough one”

“...Okay?”

“Soooo ughhh… You want vodka, rum or tequila?”

Murderface suddenly turned into a balloon out of air. Then his eyes went jaded. 

“Tequila” And then ”thank you very much” bitter and sneering as hell.

3

Dick came back from the kitchen just to discover that William is no longer in the room. Dear Lord, the producer brushed his hair nervously. If Murderface left after their previous conversation that would be really pathetic and awkward. Cyborg eyes scanned the darkness once again. No sign of a human being.

“Ey, Dick, where the fuck are you? Thought you bring me booze!”

“Excuse me, babe, but where exactly you are?”

“Balcony”

“Oh yeah. I see” Relief hit him like a warm breeze. He went outside and saw William, shirtless, sitting, bare back against the Mordhaus’s outer wall, messing around with his Dethphone.

“Now, this place is fucking cool. Brutal. If I fell out from here I’d be dead on the spot. It’s like jumping from a skyscraper.”

“It’s not that high. The night makes it higher, you know.”

“Like the end of the fucking world!” 

“You sure you wanna drink here, babe?”

“Just give this thing to me” Will demanded, pointing at the bottle in Knubbler’s hand.

“I don’t know, Willy, I...”

“Oh fuck off, you are so boring. There is a fence here, right? It’s like a cage in the sky… cage in the sky. Shit, sounds good!”

“Well, I guess so but you can’t compete with Lucy. Now Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, this is perfection! I remember when it came out, 1967...”

“Dick, shut up and just give this thing to me! Who fucking cares about 1967?! I wasn’t even around!” 

“ Right. Okay, have a drink” He said, with a whiny voice. The bassist took a long sip from the bottle, burped loudly and kept playing with the phone.

“So what are ya doing there?”

“Me? Aw, nothing. Googling pictures of tortilla. You’ve got some food by the way?”

Dick sat by his side. Something peculiar was growing in the hot air between them.

“Not really”

“Seriously? Not even a snack? Seriously Dick, you suck”

“Hey! I thought we’re here to work!”

Murderface shrugged. His body radiated heat. 

“I don’t wanna. Everyone work all the time, and what for? I never got nothing from work. It’s not worth it, why bother if you can just lay back and sleep”

“Wait. An hour ago ya said...”

“Mmmm, that one looks awesome” He gave the screen a dreamy look “I’d eat that.”

“William! An hour ago you told me...”

Murderface put his warm hand around Dicks shoulder and nodded his head in a way monks do.

“You really are a tight one”

“FOR FUCK’S SAKE MURDERFACE...”

“… AND YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ME! YOU NEVER DID AND YOU NEVER WILL, BECAUSE, WHAT, I’M NOT MADE OF COKE?! Maybe if you could snort me I would mean something to you! I’m sorry I don’t meet your standards or your expectancy or whatever! I’m sorry that I’m not a song-writing machine and I simply try to talk with you sometimes though you are so much of a stoned crazy asshole! I never got anything from you! You know what, I’m sorry I don’t jack off to my guitar like Skwissgaar! I thought you’d respect me, thought you’d care and give me some fucking time! I’m free fucking human being! Deal with that! DEAL WITH THAT!”

The producer’s pupils were huge, nearly falling out of his head and floating in the dark like two ominous, glowing UFOs. William felt almost scared. He felt anger boiling in Dick’s thin chest. He almost regretted what he said. But he couldn’t turn back time. Jesus, what have I done, he thought. He’s gonna kill me now. What have I done!?

Knubbler’s face twitched as he bared his teeth a little. He grabbed William’s shoulder and squeezed, pushing him against the wall. The bassist raised his arms and took hold of Dick’s shirt, pushing away, pretending he’s ready to fight. He felt his knuckles scratch against the blonde’s bony rib cage. He scratch harder, almost hurting him, hoping that Dick would give it up and let go. But no such thing happened. Dick seemed to be even more into it now. Murderface was fully aware what happened to Rockso and he was beginning to freak out. Looking Knubbler in the eye he was no longer sure if he confronted a friend. 

“Don’t make it about fucking coke, will ya. I can handle my shit, William, thank you very much” his voice was more like a growl, quiet and nasty “You never got anything from me, yeah? SO tell me what it is that I didn’t give you. Go on. You say you never got anything from no one? Is that so. I’ll tell you something, kid. You just don’t fucking know what you want. But don’t worry. It’s not so uncommon nowadays. I knew plenty of guys like that before. You sit around, wait for the stuff to fall from the sky and where it does, where it’s at your feet you, you don’t even make an effort to pick it for fuck’s sake. Like it’s not good enough?”

He panted hard, Will felt his breath on his cheek. 

“You’ve got friends, fans, money, fame, great fucking producer by your side but it means nothing to you” Dick poked his chest with his finger” It’s so easy to just sit and fuck with your own mind all the time. Look! If you want everything to come easy you’d never have anything and you won’t even have yourself! Name it! What do you want from me? I’m not a damn Jesus I won’t save you. I’m not taking the responsibility, okay? But I’m a guy who wants to help you a bit. You know I am. I don’t want to see you so... COWED all the time. So name it and come to me when you’re ready”

Dick quickly withdrew his hands and crawled back to his previous seat. Murderface was petrified. Various thoughts went through his mind. He didn’t kill me... then Jesus Christ what was that?!... And finally unwanted fuck, that was hot which he instantly threw away from his mind.

He glanced at the other guy to be sure that he wasn’t going to shout again. Knubbler just sat there, as random as usual, he just undid his tie and slightly rolled up sleeves of his shirt. His eyes weren’t even red any longer. 

In fact he was busy processing all the things he just said. William didn’t realize how often Dick was surprised by his own reactions. If something drove him off the rails he would swear and shout and be vicious and say all sort of crazy things. Just like a nutcase. He tried to control his temper but it was difficult, even more difficult if he wasn’t high enough. 

“So wha? Ya ain’t gonna say a thing?” He asked with his random nasal voice. “Okay, I’ll wait. Hah, I am weird when I’m sober”

“Yer sober?”

“Nah. Just soberer.”

Silence filled the air. No one even touched a bottle of tequila, it stood in front of them, shiny and abandoned. There were no clouds in the sky, the moon glowed weakly in the distance. The walls of Mordhaus bowed behind them, dark, thick and tired of the heat.

Finally, after few minutes Dick unexpectedly slammed his pale forearm with his other hand. Murderface almost jumped when he heard the noise. 

“The fuck now, man?!”

“Sorry, a mosquito. They always bite me for some reason. Hope I killed it. Shit, no, I still hear it buzz”

“Are you blind, it’s right in front of your face!” Murderface watched the creature flying an inch from Dick’s nose “Kill it! What are you waiting for?”

“Those eyes are good for a lot of stuff but not mosquitos. You kill it.”

“No, I won’t. I’ll have to hit you cause it’s almost right on your skin” William’s eyes fallowed mosquito’s every move. He was like a cat watching a pray. 

“Go on”

“Seriously? You are mad”

“Dear Lord, just do it”

“No! Okay, maybe if it sits on your hand… that would be simple. Yeah, keep your hand like that… THERE!” he attacked, leaving a red mark on Knubbler’s arm. The producer hissed but his expression was unclear. Will was absorbed in examining his hand. 

“I think it bite you again. But” he raised his head “I don’t get you. I wouldn’t like it if you hit me just like that. I mean you just called me a cow and that is bad, but hitting me..”

“Cowed. Not cow. C’mon. And it’s not like I like it that much”

“Hey”

“What?”

“Are you mad at me?” 

“Why do ya think so?”

“I don’t know. You suddenly stopped calling me babe and other stupid faggy names”

The blonde one sighed and moved his head to a side.

“Is that so. Am I mad? A bit. A lot? You bet I am”

“Heey, Dick, buddy” William seemed to feel unease” Just wanna make sure there’s no need of a taser”

Knubbler laughed and Murderface did the same, though his laugh was nervous. 

“Okay”

But that wasn’t good enough.

“But it’s not like you got it here right now, right?”

“I do have it… babe”

The bassist drew back quickly, disgust and fear on his face. 

“You asshole! You sick little asshole!”

“Oh, big deal, really. It’s just a habit. You’ve got your knife to make you feel good and I have some of my stuff. Look, I’m not the strongest guy in the house, I never was. And showbiz ain’t much of fun sometimes. Some people might not like ya. Some people might mess with ya. Some people might want to fuck with your head. Literally. And you need something to change their mind”

Disgust grew deeper into William’s face. 

“Eeew” He said. But Knubbler knew that his imagination was working hard, dirty images of him at his knees floating behind those green eyes. That was so surreal. That night was too much for both of them, he realized.

“Hey, Willy” he said quietly “you wanna see it?”

The bassist blinked deliriously. 

“See… what?”

“Relax, just a taser. Look, if you ain’t comfortable with me having it, I can give it to ya for a little while. I mean I want it back but as long as you are my guest...”

“No… no I don’t want it. You know, I think I want to take a piss. And maybe I’ll be going. The guys may need me to… write songs… they can’t do much without me” 

“Oh” Dick felt like he got crushed by a speeding train “Right”

William began to pick up his stuff (including a bottle of tequila) and back out from the balcony. 

“Been nice to talk with you, Dick… See you”

Knubbler escorted him and when the other guy was gone he locked the door, and leaned his head against the cool wall of his dark, half empty apartment. 

“You… stupid…”

Willy was gone but the heavy summer night was still here. Now it would eat him alone.


End file.
